Well, I didn’t know that kitty chemo-therapy was a thing. I do now.
Lymphoma. Kidneys, spleen, pancreas. I’m gonna miss my little black kitty something fierce. I really need some good news. Seriously.
During those times of self doubt (we all have them, shaddup), There’s that brilliant moment when you VPN into a remote network, screen-share into one machine, load terminal, SSH into another machine, and remotely Sudo the ARD agent active, and give yourself access to that second machine. All so you can complete the task you need to, on the second machine, without all the intermediary hoop jumping.
Its not much, at the moment, but I’ll take it.
Now, AAA is 15 minutes away. So my car can get jumped.
Some days are good. Some are bad. Some deserve to be lit on fire. At the moment I don’t even know how to feel. The Missus took our black kitty, Zuul, to the vet today. She’d lost some weight. We hoped for positive news, and that whatever was amiss, wouldnt be terrible. We didnt get that. Rather the opposite. Our beloved cat has cancerous tumors in her kidneys. She’s showing the very early stages of renal failure. Sadly, at the age of 7, we’re going to lose her. I’d expected to have her well into her teens, maybe pushing 20. This wont be the case.
After we first bought the house, I spent a decent amount of effort convincing my Wife that we needed cats. She wasnt a cat person then, so she wasnt completely on board. But she saw how important it was to me, and she partially caved. At the humane society, we wandered through the cat area, looking at all the cats. There was much commotion as they all wanted our attention. Except the little black one with the huge yellow eyes. She cocked her head to one side, and stared intently at me. I stared back at her, and it was instantly obvious. She was figuring me out. Cognitively. And, she was, without saying a word, or doing anything excessive, letting me know that once I’d seen all the other kitties, She’d be ready to go home. I turned to my Wife, and informed her that the black one had picked me. And truly, she had.
The little black kitty has been the household overseer, our constant companion, watch-cat, and much more than I can speak to. We’ve loved her unconditionally, and she’s put up with us, because we’re only human. Were that I could give all that I have, for her to live her life to its full possibility. I’ll be happy to have her for the time left I’m given. Now, I just need to figure out two things. 1. How to not cry for the loss of my little black best friend. And 2. How to ensure that when her last day comes, its her best day ever.
I’m sitting in the post-op/short stay ward at legacy hospital in PDX. Been here since about 1, it’s 9 now. I’m wheel-man today for my sibling. No details, as it’s not my place. But I can say I’m proud of how tough and determined my sibling is. I’ve been waiting patiently all afternoon. My squad mate, yeah. All the heaving lifting was on that side of the equation.
I am however, looking forward to a meal, taking off my shoes, putting Crash to bed, and giving my kitty some scruffles. Wouldn’t mind catching up with the wife either. All things in due time.
While I was in the waiting room, I was impressed. People like to all talk at the same time. Loudly. Over each other. About the most inane shit. I put in my earplugs (yes. I carry titanium earplugs at all times.). I then read the first two issues of Marvel’s Secret Empire story arc.
I may have, during this adventure, eaten the lamest ham sandwich I’ve ever paid for. But, yeah. Hospital cafeteria food.
It shouldn’t be so hard to find a grid style theme that I like. Grid theming should be easy. Take my posts. grid them out across the homepage. If they’re an image post, display the damned image. Dont make me use a featured image. Oh, and optimize the damned code so the whole thing loads expediently? This isn’t rocket science. Apparently it is, however. So many themes make doing exactly this, a hurdle. You have to create a dozen or so files, route them all together, and maybe, if you’re lucky, the whole thing…wont display correctly. Its a damned joke.
I’m still not 100% happy with what I’ve got. But its working so far.
I don’t know when it all fell down. A couple days ago? Weeks? I’m not sure when the last time I logged in was. Pretty sure it was a month. Between then and now, the database that drove MGL, vanished. As in it no longer existed. The WordPress files were all there, but the config and everything else, had eaten itself.
Part of me is a little numb. So much is gone. I’d rolled so much forward from LiveJournal. Then the old MGL databases. There was stuff here that even linked back to old BlackRadish.com days. 15 years worth of musings. Deleted. I’m making peace with this. I’m paving over it. We’ll start anew. New pictures, new musings. New…things.